House Reviews

“The Girls Wake Up… When They Are Hungry.”

Am I high?? Cause what in the actual fuck was that, I just watched the movie equivalent of a fever dream you have at a sleepover when you’re 11.

House is a very special case of a movie, as in a movie itself, it’s amazing, the jokes are Monty python level, the direction is unlike anything you’ll ever see, and my favourite part, the vibes are fucking immaculate.

1st Act 9.2/10 (The beginning of the fever dream you gloss over when telling someone, but still implement the key details, literally describes it perfectly.)

2nd Act 9.5/10 (Shit starts hitting the fan and all you can do is watch in absolute confusion as what’s happening looks beautiful, but is the equivalent to an Evil Dead gag.)

3rd Act 9.8/10 (I have no idea how, but the same movie that has flying trees being Kung fu kicked by a Japanese teenage school girl, manages to have the symbolism that represents DEATH AND CONSUMPTION.)

Plot 10/10 (If a movie manages to represent cyclical death and consumption in the same hour as a man spontaneously combusting into a skeleton cause the guy he’s talking to doesn’t like watermelons, then I think it’s worthy of a 10 when it works, and it sure as hell does.

Soundtrack/Score 10/10 (You could literally watch this movie with the intent of it being a visual album and you’d still enjoy it.)

Acting 8.8/10 (Nothing too spectacular that will blow you away, but nonetheless great.)

Pacing 9.3/10 (Doesn’t get slow at any point, but doesn’t rush, so it’s a nice even pacing, also there’s a whole 10 minutes worth of side plot that ends for just one gag, so maybe a 78 cut without the character and have him in the extended cut?)

Cinematography 9.7/10 (Shit should not be as good as it was, but I guess that Japanese cinema for ya.)

Character Development 8.9/10 (Took some time to get all 7 of the main girls down, but you get the names down before it’s too late, gotta love my homegirl Kung Fu.)

Writing 9.8/10 (Monty Python Meets Shakespeare Meets Sam Raimi.)

Ending 9.4/10 (SOME MEDIUM ENDING SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.)(Love endings that go into the philosophical deep end, but maybe make it an ongoing theme and not tacked on after the big reveal.)

Direction 9.5/10 (Nothing like anything you’ll ever see ever again, and for that it deserves high marks.)

Overall
113.9/120
What it deserves by objective ratings - 9.4/10
What I think it deserves by personal impact and enjoyment - 9.6/10

I saw this movie five years ago and it is still very clear in my mind

I don’t think i’ll ever see a movie that manages to be as entertaining, unsettling, funny, bizarre, entrancing, and visually stunning as this movie again in my life. i couldn’t decide whether it was good or bad that I had no clue what I was seeing half of the time until the end, because at that point it just helped the experience. 100% the most interesting and wacky audial experience i’ve ever had with a movie. the direction, setting, and plot in general all stuck out too.

9.6/10

I absolutely love horror and unique/creative/weird movies but what the actual fuck was this. Seriously.
The only good parts about this was about 1 min of visuals and that it ended.
I actually checked a couple of times to see if I was watching the right film from how bad it was.

this movie is awesome and has some absolutely insane, trippy visuals
i absolutely loved the group of friends, they were all so sweet and adorbs :( the story and symbolism was really interesting too AND I LOVED THE EVIL KITTYYYY!!!!!!

This movie is beyond genre, beyond subject, femininity galore, such a favorite

every minute of this is batshit insane and I loved all of it, never seen anything even slightly like it, most distinct and unique visuals for a live action film

I was super high and fell asleep but this is a vibe for sure

utter madness, loved every minute of it.

Kung Fu is like honest to god my fucking goat she’s killing a ghost with just her legs them dumbass ghostbusters got nothing on her.

Absolute creative lunacy. Cats and women. I could not even have imagined this during the most feverish of dreams.

Fucking weird bud

Awesome visuals, the plot is pretty bland but that doesn’t even matter considering how crazy, unique, and over the top this movie is.

6.7/10
what a fever dream this was, not really sure how I felt abt it or really what I even saw but I had a good time watching it - entertaining story with some just absolute bullshit thrown in

I have no idea what I just watched but I loved every second of it 8.8/10

very niche, very strange

unhinged 👌💞

Why yes I would love to watch a horror comedy from 1970s Japan. 😸

Definitely wasn’t the target audience here

Made me think of the Japanese girls laughing in family guy. Story is meh but respect the vision